The Quest for Perfection

Go find a piece of paper. Now find a pen or a pencil. A crayon will do quite nicely also. Now quickly write down a list of traits that you feel the perfect woman should have.

You know who she is. She is the woman that somehow has managed to get her child to sit quietly and pleasantly in the shopping cart as she strolls through the toy aisle. Unlike yours who is vaulting over the side to grab at each brightly colored wheel and knob that is available.

She is the woman that is able to enjoy a meal at her favorite restaurant with her family in tow because her children quietly eat their french fries. Whereas your children use them as ground to air missiles intent on destroying everyone at the surrounding tables.

You know who I am talking about.

Her child is dressed to perfection with both shoes on and a hair ribbon to match the beautifully handmade dress. You know who she is because you see her every time you are trying to save your child from a melt down as he or she screams “I do myself!!”.

On our ‘bad’ days we manage to run into these ‘perfect women’ on their ‘good’ days. We neglect to acknowledge that we also have these ‘good’ days that we tend to envy in others. Our ‘good’ days may just follow a different set of criteria.

For one mother, good days are when she can get her hair washed and dried and her child/children completely dressed on the third attempt. Another mother’s ‘good’ day may be when she hasn’t had to raise her voice over twenty times in the course of an hour.

Grab that crayon and write down how you would label a ‘good’ day.

What matters most is your perception of what a ‘good’ day is.

Remembering that we are viewing that ‘perfect’ woman through the lens of our ‘bad’ day.

No one is better than. We just have different priorities on different days.

You are a good mother. You are not a perfect mother. You are continually learning and growing as a mother. So put the crayon down and walk away. Supermom never existed but you are a super mom.

Ways To Slow The Quest For Perfection

• Recognize time limitations.
• Set realistic expectations.
• Don’t be afraid to say ‘no’.
• Use your mistakes as lessons for the future and let them go.
• Remember that only you can control your expectations and your behavior.
• Never allow negative self talk.
• Admit your need to be perfect, then accept that you are not.

Don’t forget, if there is a question that you would like to have answered or a topic you would like to have discussed, be sure to email me at dbeverlyhills@gmail.com. All questions will remain anonymous. All answers will be sprinkled with my perspective.